By Chaya Blumenberg, LMSW
To truly understand the impact of living with a mental illness, you either have to know someone who is diagnosed, have a diagnosis yourself, or have witnessed firsthand how mental illness can impact individuals and families. Take the journey of Racheli, for example, who has been diagnosed with “unspecified mood disorder.” Hers can be defined, not as a journey of burden and hardship, but as one of immense triumph. This is because Racheli views her illness primarily as a reminder to never give up.
Racheli is a happily married mother of two children. Like most mothers, she gives tirelessly to her children, ensuring their needs are met. One way of meeting her children's needs means providing for them financially. To do so, Racheli has worked full-time for over ten years. But balancing her life as a working mom is a juggling act, made even more challenging as Racheli pursued a Master’s degree in counseling as a way to increase her marketability as she struggled to make ends meet. To further complicate things, Racheli also struggles with mental illness. She had been admitted numerous times to psychiatric facilities, given one diagnosis after the next, before being given her final official diagnosis which resembles bipolar disorder. Racheli’s illness requires her to take medication daily to help her function and keep track of her tasks. Still, while cognizant of her difficulties, Racheli does not allow her illness to defeat her, nor does she flounder in self-pity. On the contrary: Racheli uses her challenges as a vehicle to bring hope, happiness, and success to herself and others. Her devotion and dedication to her family and community is exemplary, as she fearlessly channels her energy to strengthen others by giving inspiration to many individuals faced with mental illness. Her desire to help others has made a direct impact in the Jewish community. As the founder of Chazkeinu, an organization for Jewish women with mental illness, Racheli’s goal is to provide chizzuk to everyone who is touched by mental illness with empathetic, genuine support. As she explains, “We help people feel safe, understood and uplifted amidst their struggles.”
If we can begin to look at mental illness differently by embracing how it can be used to garner strength, we can remove some of the stigma or shame often felt with the diagnosis. As Racheli states, “It is crucial to end the feeling that there is something shameful about mental illness, so that the individuals who are suffering can get the help they need without worrying about what others will think.” Thus, her narrative awakens and encapsulates the authentic truth about mental illness, whether one is suffering from a mood disorder or a personality disorder; in mental illness, some of the same struggles exist.
People diagnosed with a personality disorder are viewed as individuals who exhibit dysfunction in interpersonal relationships, display poor impulse control, and oftentimes behave erratically. It is believed that they cannot function due to a weakened mental health state, despite the evidence that shows how these traits can sometimes positively contribute towards certain domains in life. For example, narcissistic personality traits can play a constructive role in achieving two important aspects of success: status and wealth. In fact, Sigmund Freud maintained that narcissism could be positive, especially in early childhood development, during which time it is necessary to establish a firm foundation of “self-love.”
Of the 10 types of personality disorders listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders in the DSM-V, cluster B is characterized by dramatic, overly emotional and unpredictable thinking or behavior. The personality disorders that are most commonly associated with these symptoms are borderline and narcissistic-type disorders. Borderline personality is typically presented with marked and persistent lack of impulse control and emotional regulation issues. Narcissistic personality types, on the other hand, are arrogant, harboring fantasies of power, success, and attractiveness. People with narcissistic personality traits believe that they are more special and more important than others, and expect constant praise and admiration.
When we begin to examine successful individuals who exhibit characteristics of either borderline or narcissistic personalities, either within the political arena, mental health industry, or Hollywood, we may find that there is one aspect that ties these individuals together, namely, their aspirations to be the powerful person they want to be and have become and sometimes, surprisingly, reaching the ultimate height of success in their respective profession. Moreover, it is concisely these characteristics that have afforded them their fame, spotlight, and attention. They have been fortunate and smart enough to channel their vulnerabilities to gain popularity and fuel those challenges to create positivity by making a difference in people’s lives, creating change, and bringing people closer together by creating a community of togetherness and unity.
Some of the greatest leaders in history have had mental health issues which may have helped them through times of crises. Katherine Nordal, a psychologist who heads the American Psychological Association’s professional practice program, notes that, “some of those mental health problems can, in fact, make for greatness.” For instance, Abraham Lincoln, the Great Emancipator, led the country through one of its most trying times, despite his personal suffering from severe depression for the better part of his life. Like Lincoln, Winston Churchill was a great leader, dealing not only with international strife, but with his own mental health struggles at the same time. It is believed that Churchill struggled with bipolar disorder, in which he would stay up all night writing during periods of high mania, eventually publishing 43 books in addition to attending to his political duties.
Personality traits from various personality disorders can serve to connect people and create meaningful relationships beyond the relationship that is formed with a therapist. On a good day, persons who exhibit these traits are lively, creative, and fun-loving. They are loyal, passionate, and compassionate and are around-the-clock contributors to society, despite their mental illness. In fact, if non-sufferers had the opportunity to walk a mile in their shoes and experience their emotions, thoughts, and urges, people with mental illness would soon be regarded as warriors.
Those who are fortunate enough to have characteristics like Racheli, Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill, and countless other great leaders, have the strength to channel those would-be negative impulses towards positivity. Have you been diagnosed with mental illness? It is important to remember that you have what it takes to reverse negative outcomes and turn them into creative endeavors which can generate satisfaction and accomplishment in your life and the lives of others. These are unique qualities one must cherish; when channeled in the right direction and coupled with insight, intelligence, and guidance, you will also be a winner in your own right and succeed in life. Remember, there is no such thing as a one dimensional being. You are always more than a diagnosis.
Chaya Blumenberg, LMSW is trained in Play Therapy and works as a School Counselor in Belz
Elementary School. Chaya can be contacted at chayauk@gmail.com.