I recently saw a 12-year-old boy drinking bourbon at a party. He was making faces as he absorbed the burn of the liquid. I asked him who gave him the drink.
“A friend,” he replied.
“Do you like it?” I asked.
“It’s uchy.”
“So why drink it?”
“I drink it so I can be part of their group,” was his honest, and very naïve, response.
I followed him around for a few minutes and saw that the group he wanted to be part of consisted of about half a dozen young boys, none older than about 15. Six adolescent boys, ages 12 through 15, all drinking alcohol to fit into the crowd.
This is not an isolated incident. I have seen and heard about so many of these troubling substance use behaviors in our community. They exist, not only among the young, but across all age groups and social strata.
Take, for example, another popular idea among the young 20-year-old crowd.
“I can’t have my aufruf at our shul because none of my friends will show.” The reason? My shul is a dry shul.
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At the next wedding you attend, spend a few minutes at the chosson’s tisch and watch how much alcohol is consumed.
On Purim and Simchat Torah, how many 20-, 30- and 40-year-olds get so drunk in the community that they end up in an emergency room with alcohol poisoning?
On holidays and special occasions, you might see water bottles hidden behind bushes outside of yeshivas and shuls. It’s not water that’s inside those bottles.
Is it possible that we are seeing the growth of a generation of addicts? Does alcohol use inevitably lead to the use of harder substances, and ultimately, to the opioid epidemic our generation is faced with?
Not everyone who drinks alcohol becomes an alcoholic, and not everyone who binges on alcohol goes on to harder substances. However, the younger a person starts drinking the more likely they are to develop a serious addiction problem. Ignoring the fact that there may be a problem simply exacerbates the destruction that alcohol can cause.
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Just so we understand what alcohol has been proven to cause, let’s review: The facts are that alcohol consumption, even at moderate levels, has been found to be associated with significant adverse brain outcomes. These include atrophy of certain brain areas like the hippocampus, which is the portion of the brain responsible for retaining long-term memory. The corpus callosum, the strands that join the two hemispheres of the brain, also show signs of change in people who drink alcohol in moderation. The two hemispheres of the brain have different functions; if they cannot communicate with one another, there can be a significant deterioration in understanding and reacting to people and the environment. It is no wonder, therefore, that alcohol and violence often go hand in hand. That violence is often aimed towards women and children, but can also be aimed towards the drinker. To reiterate, the younger a person starts drinking alcohol, especially in the teen years before the brain is fully developed, the greater the likelihood that this will impact on these brain structures, and ultimately, the individual’s behavior.
I am often asked who is responsible for this significant uptick in alcohol use and other substance addictions. Many would like to lay the blame on parents, others on the schools, and far too many want to blame the surrounding culture. I think that all are correct, and all carry some of the blame.
In many households, parents themselves spend far too much time discussing the liquor in their cabinets and which new wine they have found. Perhaps for some this is a sign of success; the ability to purchase a fine bottle of wine for Shabbat is something to aspire to. Unfortunately, the consumption of this new, more expensive, beverage becomes an end unto itself. Moderation goes out the door and bingeing to the point of completing a bottle in one sitting has, in some circles, become the norm, a sign of success. It is important to realize that there is a world of difference between offering a l’chaim and downing seven or eight drinks.
Among yeshiva students, a tradition seems to have been developing, referred to as “pre-loading.” Having two or three drinks before Shabbos or going to shul is a new norm, occurring most commonly in certain school settings, though I believe it has become even more pervasive. Little is being done to educate students as to the hazards of drinking so much. And, to further exacerbate the issue, there are adults who take part in this practice, encouraging others to join.
While the surrounding culture is always a contributing factor, it is also an easy scapegoat. Our problems are not always forced on us from outside the community. Awareness, prevention, and education are key in addressing the common practice of socializing with alcohol. Also important to realize is that troubled individuals who self-medicate and have a history of abuse are those most susceptible to developing a substance or alcohol use disorder. As a community, we have an obligation to educate our people to enjoy a fine wine or a shot of whiskey, but in the right time, the right way, and the right amount.
Dr. Michael J. Salamon, Ph.D., FICCP is a fellow of the American Psychological Association, Senior Psychologist/Director of ADC Psychological Services, PLLC and the author of numerous articles and books, most recently, Abuse in the Jewish Community (Urim Publications). His website is