Our Gemara on Amud Aleph makes an assertion about the psychology of ownership pride in order to explain the following position stated by the Mishna:

In the case of one who deposits produce with another, even if it is lost due to spoilage or vermin, the watchman may not touch it, as it is not his. 

What is the reason that the first tanna said that the watchman should not touch the produce? Rav Kahana says that it is based on the principle: A person prefers a kav (measure) of his own produce to nine kav of another’s produce. Consequently, despite the spoilage, the owner prefers that the watchman not touch the produce. 

The human need to feel attachment and mastery over himself and his objects is a natural and important instinct, when properly moderated. This is what motivates all kinds of achievement and, as with all emotions that have been conceived and endowed from God, they represent deep patterns in the spiritual realm as well. There is a mystical concept known as Nahama De-Kisufa, which translates as “Bread of Shame.”  (Imagine a beggar who must beg for his food, but all the while feels humiliated at being a “nebuch case”. This deep idea is brilliantly expressed by the Ramchal, in Derech Hashem (Part One, The Purpose of Creation, Ch. 2):

God is the greatest form of perfection, and part of His perfect goodness is bestowing this goodness. He therefore designed a world where we can have autonomy and ability to choose. So we can earn our reward.  While we can never be fully independent as God is, because there can only be one God, God gives us a shot at the sense of perfection and fulfillment.  A sense of fulfillment and mastery cannot be given to someone as a gift, just as you cannot give self-esteem or confidence. God designed the conflicted human personality with its ability to be noble and sublime but equally able to be evil and small. This is in order that what we choose to do is done so freely, and has meaning.  

You might ask, if God can do anything, and He only wants to be gracious, why can’t He “rig the system” and give us the feeling of satisfaction of accomplishing, even if we are not?  The answer is that God cannot do that, anymore than He can make a stone He cannot lift, or make 1+1=3.  This is not considered an imperfection or shortcoming on God’s part when He is “bound” to a truth. For more on this, see Ralbag’s commentary on Iyov (7:21), where he quips, “Even though a rooster can say “cock-a-doodle-do” while a human cannot, we do not say that the rooster has a superior quality to that of a human.”

People are not happy when they feel overwhelmed and hopeless, but are also just as miserable when they have no challenges.  We do not feel happy by trying to be happy. God built us to feel good when we are working to accomplish meaningful goals. If we do not feel overwhelmed, and we feel we are on a level and fair playing field, the hard work is exhilarating, and not draining. 

Translations Courtesy of Sefaria, except when, sometimes, I disagree with the translation

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