Our Gemara on Amud aleph discusses the psychological assumption that many women prefer companionship over loneliness to the extent that they might be agreeable to marry someone far less suitable than she would have initially preferred. The statement is in a thick Aramaic, which suggests it was an adage spoken by the populace (see Rashi Kesuvos 75a “Tan” and Rashi Kiddushin 41a, “D’amar”):
The phrase, “Tav Le-Meysav Tan Du, Mi Le-Meysav Armalu” “It is better to be a pair than remain alone”, linguistically is often related by the commentaries to the Greek word “duo” or “two”, meaning double or two. For example, in Sanhedrin 38b Du-Parzufin, the primordial man was described as having a double form, male and female.
Using this understanding that “Du” can connote two in Talmudic Hebrew and other languages, different commentaries derive ethical messages from this word by way of derash. Aderes Eliyahu (Bereishis 5) reads this into the verse in (Bereishis 2:18):
וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהִ֔ים לֹא־ט֛וֹב הֱי֥וֹת הָֽאָדָ֖ם לְבַדּ֑וֹ אֶֽעֱשֶׂה־לּ֥וֹ עֵ֖זֶר כְּנֶגְדּֽוֹ׃
said, “It is not good for the Human to be alone; I will make a fitting counterpart for him.
The Hebrew word for alone is לבדו, but he reads it as Lev Du, two hearts. Meaning, man should not be split in his loyalties, rather fully committed to God.
Similarly, Shalah (Sha’ar Haosiyos, Shin, Shetika) interprets the sin described in Viduy, “Dibarnu Dofi”, “We have spoken falsely”, as “Du-Piy”, two mouths - double speak.
Perhaps it is not a coincidence that all four of these phrases that use “du” which describe duality, also touch on the theme of loneliness. (Tan-Du, Du Parzufin, Lev-Du and Du-Piy.) Sometimes we must be alone and stand apart to stick by our convictions, but stubborn arrogance or internal duplicity leads to loneliness and lack of fulfillment.
Translations Courtesy of Sefaria, except when, sometimes, I disagree with the translation
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